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Don’t Be a “Super-Parent” — Just Be a Parent

Marlon Brando as Jor-El, with Kal-El played by...
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No, it’s not your kid. He or she would neverdo those things, right? Your teen probably brings home the grades like you bring home the bacon. He or she has a great circle of friends—clean, polite, and stable. The teachers love your son or daughter with a passion. Armageddon would occur before you’d realize that your child was doing drugs. Even if you found out that there were ecstasy pills underneath his or her pillow, your immediate response would be to handle it all your own, like the Super-Parent of the Universe, like Jor-el of Krypton sending away his only son Kal-el to become the world’s Superman. Because you don’t need anyone’s help, right? You can handle your teen’s drug addiction all by yourself.

Be humble. Because that’s not the best mindset to take with your troubled teen. It’s serious business, and you don’t have to be a Super-Parent. Just be a parentwho cares and recognize the important steps—such as finding the correct resources to help your child with the addiction. That could mean rehabilitation such as with TheCyn.com, and while that’s a painful decision to make for both you and your child, trust that it’s the best decision ever. This, of course, is a no-brainer, but under no circumstances do you evertake your frustrations out on your child. It almost goes without saying.

Moreover, understanding the problem is important as well. Don’t assume it’s because of peer pressure from friends. There are a number of other issues it could be: bullies, clinical depression, and low self-esteem. Just recognize the underlying issue and deal with it accordingly. What’s important, too, is understanding—not just action. Quite honestly, most of the action inevitably will be done by your child.

Keep these tips in mind. It’s part of being a good parent. It will lead to your son or daughter being a good kid. Not a bad one.

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Nurturing a Child’s Learning Abilities

In the early 1960′s, when a child caused problems for teachers in the classroom, school officials often placed the child in a class separate from the regular classroom. In certain schools, they called this the Special Class.

The level of disruption caused by the child did not matter to school administrators. To them, the child was troublesome and they had to separate that child so as not to interfere with other students.

It was not until November of 1975 that Congress approved the Education for All Handicapped Children Act, which went into effect in October of 1977. This act gave schools the funds to obtain resources for children in need of special instruction.

This brought to the forefront the needs of children who, while not exhibiting any physical or emotional disabilities, still required special instruction in class. The IQ of these children can range from average to superior, to genius. The problem is not the inability to learn, it is the inability to learn in the same manner as everyone else.

Parents of children with superior intelligence have some idea about the problems gifted children have with learning disabilities. Sadly, parents of children with average intelligence may never find out that the only reason their children are not thriving in school, is that they learn on a different level than most. The reason may be as simple as an extremely smart child’s inability to be a good test-taker. Parents may also discover that their child is bored in class.

Schools with gifted programs have the resources to match a gifted student with a school psychologist or counselor. The counselor will test the gifted student to determine the best course of study that will best suit the advanced student. They call these Individual Education Plans.

All children should have access to these resources. Anytime a child struggles in school, parents should request a meeting with the teacher, the counselor, and other school administrators, to determine the cause of the child’s difficulty. A number of key issues may be uncovered that will ease the difficulties children may encounter in school.

Filed Under: Child Development, Education Tagged With: ,

Is Your Adolescent Merely Going through a Phase?

As early as the 1950′s, child psychologists theorized that adolescents go through different phases as they experience their bodies changing, such as trying to define themselves through role-playing.

This period in a child’s life is most assuredly the most difficult time for parents, unless you are one of the lucky ones. Some teenagers seem to get from the age of 13 to 18 without too many problems.

To find out whom they are and how they relate to the world, adolescents go through phases that include dressing up like the popular teens or dressing up in outfits that no one else is wearing. Teenage boys and girls now dye their hair with fluorescent colors, and pierce and tattoo their bodies. This is equal to girls in the sixties wearing mini-skirts, and teenage boys growing their hair longer.

Eventually, most adolescents will stop most of the role-playing and will understand how they fit into society. If a parent can find the restraint at some point to stop commenting on the way their teen looks or dresses, the teen will eventually move on and begin to dress in a more appropriate way.

There are those adolescents, however, who struggle to get through this stage, and that is where parents need to step in. A parent needs to watch for other signs that are not in line with their teen’s behavior, as they know it. When a phase becomes an obsession or a problem in school or with friends, most parents will recognize it themselves, or they may begin receiving phone calls of complaints from the teen’s school or parents of their friends.

Counseling with a child psychologist will reveal any problems they may be experiencing that are causing them to act out. Adolescents are able to talk to strangers about subjects that are not comfortable talking to their parents about, and some problems are resolved within a short time.

Child psychologists can also advise parents on what to do if their teen’s problem is something other than a phase, on what to do next, if they feel that counseling is not enough.

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Life Skills For Children With Special Needs

When you are living with a special child the most important thing you can teach them are life skills. These simple skills will help a special child live a full and rewarding life. Comprehensive learning activities are used to help special children acquire the essential life skills they need to become productive adults. A key factor in living with a special child is teaching them how to apply their skills and knowledge to new and familiar situations that will occur throughout their lives. Children with special needs learn how to accomplish the fundamental life skills most of us take for granted. These skills include social, personal, occupational, and daily living skills.

Teaching life skills to a special child will greatly improve their living conditions and help them conquer daily living tasks. Mastering these basic skills are the first steps towards productivity and independence. Children with special needs are taught how to apply these skills to their occupational, personal, and private lives. Your child should be encouraged to try new activities and hands-on projects that can help them develop sustainable skills that will last a lifetime. Trying new things will help special children develop practical experience and teach them how to apply the learned skills to their personal or social lives.

Medical and educational websites offer informative details on living with a special child. You can find resource information, learning activities, and teaching facilities for children with special needs. These resources are widely used by parents who are living with a special child to teach them the basic life skills they will need to help them function as an adult. With the proper training and life skills a special child can be independent and productive. This will allow them to secure regular employment, as well as live a happy and normal life.

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Caring For A Child With Special Needs

Caring for a child with special needs can be quite challenging, but with patience and the right resources it can also be very rewarding. These resources can help you find ways to manage the emotional and social issues that your family will face when living with a child who has special needs. Parents of special needs children can find useful resource articles regarding life skills, behavior strategies, sibling issues, special occasions, and stress management. There is also resource information for successful community interaction, family inspiration and support, and making plans for the future.

When children cannot control or understand their behavior parents can use a variety of helpful techniques to manage and modify the behavior of a child with special needs. Parents of special needs children can learn how to set reachable goals that will teach them to be successful. Children with special needs can be hard to handle in public places or when visiting friends in the community. If you are going out to a restaurant choose a fun place where your child will feel comfortable and welcomed. Select a kid-friendly restaurant where perfect table manners and grown-up behavior are not necessary. If you are planning a trip to the mall set specific time limits, pack some of their favorite toys and snacks, and always shop with another adult.

It is important for children with special needs to participate in some type of physical activity on a regular basis. Some organized sports for special needs children are baseball, soccer, hockey, tennis, and swimming. There are also special needs community and summer camps that are especially designed for children with life-threatening medical issues, intellectual disabilities, and developmental differences. These special needs camps allow children with disabilities to experience a fun summer of outdoor activities. There are special needs camps for a wide variety of childhood disabilities including Tourette Syndrome, cancer, diabetes, and congenital heart failure.

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Gifted children: how does that look?

Who knows a child better than its own parents? When the realization that you may have a gifted child occurs, it can be a mixed bag of emotions. Typically it is first realized at home before the child even enters the academic world.
The child is full of wonder and excitement to learn. They soak up any form of information, they can remember explicit details, and have an extensive vocabulary before they even enter kindergarten.
As a teacher, they can identify a gifted student due to how quickly the child picks up on the lessons being taught. They also generally pass their peers when it comes to classroom tasks. It is up to the teacher and the parents to collectively come together and get the child tested to in fact determine their gifts.
If the next step is determining that fact, a trained psychologist or other profession can evaluate the child through interviews, feedback from teacher and parents, and testing. Some of those tests can include: IQ tests, behavior checklists, and reading assessments. Once all of these are completed, the professional will sit with the parents and come up with options and recommendations for the child such as an accelerated learning program or grade advancement.
Other options that may be available are a different learning environment such as private schools or enrichment programs. If the child is school age, it is important as a parent to sit them down and get their feelings on how to proceed. It is key to allow them to have a say so in what happens. It is one thing to want to see them succeed, but that will not happen if the child is miserable in their current setting.
This is why evaluation with a professional may be vital. As a parent you need to be educated on the challenges your child will face, and how best to deal with them when they arise.

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Gifted children: parenting 101

c. 1452
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When it comes to parenting a gifted child, it is a challenging experience, but when the parent encounters it they should embrace it. It is imperative for parents to be educated on the characteristics of a gifted child so they can be there for the child, and dispel any myths that surround the title of  ”gifted”.
As the parent of a gifted child you probably saw signs very early on. The child has a love of books, they love to learn and discover and so on. Having a gifted child is part nature and part nurture, and will grow day by day with love and support.
When you have a gifted child, it not only affects the child, but also the entire family. It is helpful to seek out other families that have gifted children for advice on how to handle different situations. This is a good way to share ideas with each other. It is also helpful to read as much as you can on ways to parent a gifted child. Knowledge is always powerful.
It is also important to respect the ideas and opinions of the child. It is vital to be sensitive to their needs, fears, and concerns. Generally, gifted children have intense emotions, and the fact that needs to be repeated to them is that the title gifted does not define all of who they are.
They need to know they are still a normal child, and that they will make mistakes and fight with their siblings. Keep the lines of communication open at all times. Know what is going on in your child’s life such as friends at school, and friends after school. Make sure to make the gifted child’s siblings know they are just as cherished as the gifted child. Lastly, make sure the rules are clear, reasonable, and nonnegotiable for all the children in the family including the gifted child. This will go far with not showing any favoritism.

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The biggest advocator for gifted children: the parents

The current logo of the Gifted Education Centre
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As a parent of a gifted child it is imperative to be their biggest advocator. There are limited programs available to a gifted child, so who better to fight for them but their parents?
Not all educational institutions are equipped to properly teach a gifted child. Unfortunately, for the gifted child, some educators believe since they are advanced they can muddle through it without any guidance. There are some schools that are resorting to putting all the gifted students in one classroom, which in turn leads to further alienation from their peers.
As a parent, always stay informed on your child’s progress, scholastically, and emotionally. Trust your instincts when it comes to what is best for them. Another word of advice is to try and not create issues if there are none, but also don’t allow others to create them either.
Some educators and parents are under the impression that the gifted child needs to be overloaded with many assignments to keep them challenged, and that is a misconception. That can lead to discouragement and the sense of being overwhelmed. Always ask questions when it comes to your child.
One of those questions may be is the staff properly trained to adequately teach your gifted child? Do you know what the school policy on gifted children is? What do they offer? What types of enrichment programs are available for your child to participate in, if any?
Lastly, always try to involve your child in the decisions that are being made. Keep a positive attitude, because children sense frustration and stress. Seek out parents who also have gifted children, and have been through this process for ideas and advice on how they handled it. Another idea is to have one on one meetings with teachers consistently. It also is also a good plan of action to have an IEP (Individualized Education Plan) in place as a starting and reflecting point.

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Challenges surrounding the gifted child

Parenting is full of challenges. With all children, including gifted children, parents face a multitude of obstacles when it comes to the different personalities and parenting. Each child develops at a different rate emotionally, physically, and intellectually, which leads to figuring out what is the best way for each individual.
Many times with a gifted child, the adults expect them to be, well adults mentally. That is a definite misconception, which can lead to frustration for the parent as well as the child. It is shown that the gifted child will go through the stages of morality development at a faster pace than their peers, but they still are not mentally able to process as an adult mind would.
Teachers and parents need to keep themselves informed in regards to, not only the academic needs, but also the social and emotional needs of the gifted child. It becomes a coordinated effort by the family, school and supplemental programs to support and encourage the child. It is helpful to try to create a peer group for the gifted child made up of children with common interests and abilities. This will help with keeping the gifted child from going into isolation.
Another challenge that is generally faced with having a gifted child is perfectionism. Any child, gifted or not, can battle with this, but it seems to be more prevalent in gifted children. Many times they feel the pressure of the expectation for them to excel because they’re labeled a gifted child. There is healthy perfectionism, but it can turn unhealthy rather quickly if triggered continuously by family, friends, school and so on. The child may begin to self-sabotage to get the desired failure results. The pressure that they put on themselves will only continue to grow, and become an obsession if not caught early on.
It is crucial to be aware of any and all changes in your child, gifted or not. Try to stay consistent with no special treatment for the gifted child or those around them.

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